Funny Bone

By liquidglitter

It’s hazy outside. The sky is soft and milky. It’s going to be boiling later today, that’s what Britney’s mom said, and that’s cool because it means Britney can wear her new plaid mini skirt and her cute little flip-flops. She’s made the effort to straighten her hair, too. Word is, there’s a new transfer student, a guy from England, and he might be hot. Besides, she ended up making out with Justin again on Saturday, and maybe this time he’ll ask her out.

She arrives at school and scans around the entrance hall for people worth talking to. Christina’s over by the girl’s bathrooms wearing that nasty red halter top, a red sneer on her lips as she talks to her little cronies. Britney smiles as she walks into the bathrooms; realizing, with some satisfaction, that Chrissy’s tan line from Friday still hasn’t faded.

There’s toilet roll on the floor already and Britney sniffs in disdain and turns her attention to the mirror.

Christina walks in a few minutes later, just as Britney is reapplying her lipgloss. Christina meets Britney’s eyes in the mirror and smiles.

“I like that gloss on you,” she says. “What color is it?”

Britney pouts and offers it to the other girl.

“Candy Rose, I think.”

Christina takes the little tube and turns it over between her fingers.

“Nice. Smells like vanilla.”

Britney nods vaguely and considers smudging on a little more kohl. Christina hands the gloss back and flips her hair,

“I’m going with red at the moment. I had my colors done on Saturday and the woman said I should try fiery tones this month.”

“You look hot,” Britney declares, stuffing the gloss back into her little sparkly bag. “I love that top.”

“It’s cute isn’t it?” Christina says, and smiles. Her teeth are shockingly white. Britney makes a mental note to book an appointment with her dentist.

The bell rings and Christina hurries off to class. She’s got English Lit with Mr. Hall and he’s giving detentions for being late. Britney, on the other hand, has math first and the later she gets there the better. Miss. Simpson is new, and a friend of her mom so she won’t get in trouble for it, either.

She tugs at the neck of her tank top so that a sliver of her pink bra strap peeks out. She'll probably get busted by one of the hall monitors for inappropriate dress but that's nothing new. By her standards, today's mini-and-tank ensemble is practically reserved.

She's late to class, and Miss. Simpson scowls but doesn't say anything. Britney sighs as she looks around the desks; there's no one of interest. She drops her bag down by a seat one row from the front and takes out her fluffy pink pen and a pad of Tommy Girl scented paper.

The lesson drags on and on, and not even counting all the pimples on John McKenzie's face can provide sufficient amusement. She finishes the algebra quickly, as she always does, and sets about doodling little hearts in the margin. She calculates her compatibility with Justin for about the millionth time, and glances down at the desk and laughs because the answer is right there, etched into the wood. Evidently she's sat here before. She changes the spelling of Justin's name in an attempt to raise the percentage, and adds an 'e' to her own name but it's still only seventy four percent so she gives up with a huff.

Miss Simpson miraculously appears by her desk and peers over her shoulder at the sums. She makes approving little noises and walks around to face Britney.

"Britney," she says, in that annoyingly tentative way, "have you ever considered joining…the special class? You're very talented."

"Shh!" Britney hisses. "Keep your voice down! Are you kidding me? Only losers join the 'special class'. I think I'll stick right here, thanks."

Miss Simpson's lips purse a little. "I know what people think about the special class, but I think you would find it very rewarding—"

Britney snorts derisively. "You know? I think I'll give it a miss. I'm not a fucking dork."

Miss Simpson scowls some more, and opens her mouth like she's going to speak, but in the end she just sighs and walks back to her desk. Britney looks around nervously, hoping no one will have heard their little conversation. After all, she has a reputation to uphold here. No one likes an overly intelligent girl, and the dumb blonde act works just fine, thank you. It's bad enough that she's in the math class at all, but she can blame that on her parents.

Back out in the hallway, Britney stuffs her outrageously heavy math textbook into her locker and checks her phone for texts. There aren't any, but it's still early. She's just putting the phone back into her bag when two large, warm hands wrap around her waist.

"Hey baby," Justin whispers against her neck. "You're looking mighty fine today. What's the occasion?"

Britney giggles and swats his hands away. She closes her locker door and leans back against it.

"Transfer student," she says playfully. "Why? You think I was dressing up just for your lame ass?"

Justin laughs. "Mmm. That's exactly what I thought."

Panic flits briefly across Britney's face, because surely Justin doesn’t know that she likes him again? She totally swore Lance to secrecy.

Justin blinks at her, "What?"

Britney laughs. "No, nothing. Just thinking about something I said I’d do."

Justin looks at her curiously, "You're cool about Saturday, right? You're not, like, freaking out again?"

Britney scowls. "Don’t flatter yourself," she snaps.

Justin ducks his head and braces his arms on either side of her slim hips.

"Sorry, babe," he mutters, lips dry and warm against her neck. "Just…you know, people were saying stuff and I thought…but that's cool. Friends, right?"

Britney sighs. "Always," she says, resigning herself to her fate of dying alone, and studiously ignoring her stupid body's reaction to Justin's proximity.

Justin leans his forehead against hers and grins. "Love you," he says, his fingers dancing over her hipbones.

Britney can't fight it. "Love you too," she concedes, smiling despite herself. She never wins against Justin.

Justin steps back and pulls his rucksack off the floor.

"What have you got next?" he asks. Someone knocks into him as they pass. Justin turns and calls after them, "Watch it, asshole!"

Britney picks at her nails, perfect and shiny candy pink from this morning. "History. What about you?"

"Football practice. Oh, hey, I gotta go. I'll see you in the canteen."

He flashes her a blinding grin and jogs off. Britney watches him go and feels her stomach turn, just a little.

"Still lusting after the golden boy?"

Britney turns to Lance, scowling.

"Shut up!" she hisses, and whacks his arm. "Lance, I swear to god, if you've told anyone—"

Lance rolls his eyes. "Will you relax? Christ. Give me some credit. I'm not a complete asshole."

"Hmm," Britney says, still annoyed. She adds, spitefully, "How're things with you and Chrissy?"

Now it's Lance's turn to scowl. He's just about to open his mouth and say something that looks like it will particularly venomous when Britney cuts him off.

"I'm sorry," she says, sighing. "I'm just…it kinda sucks, you know? Of course you know."

"I'm gonna ignore that little dig because right now? I feel sorry for you. And yeah, OK, I do know how it feels. Things with Chrissy aren’t going too well. No, wait, they're not even going. She still likes Colin."

Britney slings an arm around Lance's waist. "I'm sorry, honey. Unrequited love, huh?"

She and Lance walk to history together. Britney sits behind JC and spends most of the lesson kicking the back of his chair and passing notes to Lance about his upcoming pool party.

At the end of the lesson Britney lingers around to wait for JC, and he tackles her and presses her up against the wall, grinning.

"You're so goddamn annoying," he says, voice low and wicked. "And you're gonna pay. If I didn’t know any better, I'd think you were flirting."

Britney smiles, sugary sweet, and says, "Well, we both know that's not the case, don’t we? Been there. Done that. Got the STD."

JC laughs and jostles her with his shoulder. "Bitch," he says, affectionately, and they head out to the canteen, his thumb hooked into the waistband of her skirt.

Britney smiles at all the girls as she walks down the hallway with JC. They're all jealous of her; she knows that, but it doesn't bother her. She's a flirt, but she's not a bitch, not really, so it's not like they're openly hostile.

JC spots Justin sitting at a table with Chris and Christina and some guy Britney doesn't recognize. She sits across from him as JC creeps up behind Justin and thwaps him around the back of the head, knocking the drink out of his hand and all down his football shirt.

Justin leaps up to face JC.

"Motherfuck!" he cries, tackling JC to the floor.

The whole canteen turns to look, and Britney stands up on her tippy-toes and chants, "Fight! Fight! Fight!" and soon everyone has joined in.

Though they're both tall, it's Justin who's more built, and soon JC is lying flat on his back, flushed and laughing. Justin grins at the assembled crowd and stands up, pulling JC up with him. He slaps JC on the back and strips off his shirt, still wet and sticky from the soda.

"Stupid dicks," Britney states, when they sit back down.

Justin rolls his eyes and starts talking to JC.

"So you must be Britney?"

Britney looks over to the originator of the British accent, and remembers she must be sitting opposite the new guy. A slow smile creeps across her lips.

"Yeah," she says, aiming for a coy look. "You must be…?"

"Orlando," the guy says. "I'm from London."

Britney decides she likes him already.

"So I guess you've met these idiots?" she says, indicating Justin and JC, who are now flicking peas at each other.

Orlando laughs. "Yeah. Justin's in my tutor group; he's been showing me around."

She nods. "Cool. Are you coming to Lance's pool party? You should."

"Yeah, I've heard something about that. Friday isn’t it? Lance sounds loaded."

"Yeah it's on Friday. Lance's house is, like, huge. His dad's a lawyer."

Orlando nods. "Nice."

The rest of the lunch break passes pretty quickly. Britney decides that Orlando is definitely prime getting-over-Justin material.

---------

Britney decides to wear her super low-riding jeans on Friday and a cute little tube top with a sparkly pink corsage. She paints her nails hot pink and wears pink lipgloss to match. Co-ordination is everything.

JC gives her a ride to school. Yesterday he got an A in his History test and his parents have decided to let him use their car. He's grinning like an idiot as he pulls up outside her house.

"Hey gorgeous," he says, as she struts down her driveway.

"Hey sexy," she calls back, and blows him a kiss.

He opens the door for her and she climbs in and nods approvingly.

"Nice ride," she says. "All the chicks will dig you in this."

JC grins and slams on the accelerator. "That's what I'm hopin'."

"And maybe some of the guys, too," she adds, and bites her lip.

JC swats playfully at her arm. "Maybe," he says, and he's smiling.

Britney sits back and lets JC's hip-hop pulse through her body.

They arrive at school, and JC pulls up right at the entrance, music blaring. He's still grinning like an idiot. Britney likes that about him; he's still kind of innocent, still child-like in his enthusiasm.

Britney kisses him on the cheek and gets out. JC waves to some people he knows, and some random hot girl, and goes to park round in the school car park.

She runs into Chris by her locker.

"Hey honey," she says, twiddling the little dial on her padlock.

"Hey yourself," he says. "Saw you riding with C in a suspiciously shiny car. He finally gave in to a life of crime?"

"Yeah," she replies, taking out her Glass Menagerie textbook. "I saw him holding up the seven-eleven last night."

Chris nods, "Right. You're his moll then?"

"Baby, I'm nobody's moll," Britney says, clicking the padlock back on her locker and turning to face Chris. Chris laughs and slings an arm around her and they walk to English Lit together.

JC's also in their class, and he arrives late looking pissed and out-of-breath.

"Sorry 'm late," he mutters, in the general direction of Mr. Hall, and comes to sit down behind Britney.

"They made me move my fucking car," he whispers against the back of her neck.

"Bummer," she whispers back, not taking her gaze away from the front of the class. "How come?"

"Apparently I need to 'apply' for a parking space. Stupid assholes. I had to park in Wal*Mart."

Britney laughs softly. "That sucks, babe. Sorry."

"No, it's not like it's your fault. Ugh…sorry, I'm just kinda pissed."

"No worries."

JC lays a soft kiss to the back of her neck. Britney smiles to herself.

There are no more classes after English because the school is being closed for some renovation over the weekend.

Britney waits outside the school with JC and Chris. Justin walks out, giving Christina a piggyback. She represses the little twinge of jealousy at seeing the two of them. It's stupid, she knows. There's nothing going on.

Justin lets Christina down and she comes over to talk to Britney.

"Hey honey," she says, tugging at the hem of her spotty sundress. "I haven't seen you, like, all week! I love that top," she adds, poking at the corsage.

"Thanks," Britney says. "It's vintage. You're coming tonight, right?"

"Of course. Hey, you want to get ready together? My parents are out tonight, we could steal some of mom's schnapps."

Britney claps, "Ooh! Is it toffee?"

"You're damn right it's toffee."

"I am there! I have to go home and grab some lunch but I guess mom could drive me round to yours after that?"

"Yeah, call me when you’re on your way."

Christina, Lance and Chris head off together to catch a ride with Chris's mom.

"How're you guys getting back?" Justin asks, shoving his hands in his pockets. His t-shirt rides up just a little and Britney tries not to gaze at the golden sliver of flesh now exposed.

"I'm driving!" JC says, clapping happily.

Justin laughs. "You're such a fucking girl, man."

JC glares momentarily and resumes bouncing.

"God," he says, and slings his arm around JC's waist, "you're too fucking cute when you're all excited, Jayce."

JC just grins. Justin laughs and blows a raspberry against his neck. JC laughs and shoves him away, but not too hard. Justin snakes his arm around JC's waist again.

Britney rolls her eyes. "Goddamit! Would you guys stop flirting? Neglected girl here!"

"Aww," Justin says, and slings an arm around her waist too. "Feeling left out, baby? You know you're my number one girl." He drops his voice to an almost-conspiratorial whisper, "C's just my bit on the side."

Britney laughs and JC whacks Justin's side.

"Well, as fun as this has been, I gotta get home, prepare my fine ass for tonight. I need to get laid, man, I'm not kidding," Justin announces, and kisses them both on the cheek.

Britney and JC begin the walk over to Wal*Mart to fetch JC's car.

"You know? It feels wrong being here and not buying anything. The urge to shop is almost overwhelming," JC says, once they're both sitting in the car, facing the huge Wal*Mart sign.

"I hear ya," Britney replies, thinking about that new Maybelline lipgloss she wants.

JC pulls out of the car park and puts on some old sixties soul. Britney smiles; she likes JC's taste in music.

"You and Justin are so cute," she declares as they drive past an ice cream van.

JC laughs. "Um, thanks?"

"No," Britney says, thoughtfully. "Like, you're so cute together."

JC turns to look at her and nearly drives into a cyclist.

"What's brought this on?"

She shrugs. "I don't know. You guys are so close. I miss that with him, you know? It's not quite the same since…you know."

"Since you guys started getting wasted and making out, you mean?"

Britney sighs. "Yeah. I don't know where I stand with him anymore. We used to be, like, best friends but now…he doesn't talk to me the way he used to, Jayce."

There's a moment's silence.

"He's an ass," JC finally concludes, as they pull into Britney's driveway. "He doesn't deserve you. You're…gorgeous and…sexy…and you've got a great sense of humor." He grabs her hands in his, and strokes the insides of her wrists with his thumbs. "Any guy would be lucky to have you."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah."

JC doesn't move. Britney bites her lip, and then he's leaning over, and bringing their hands up between them. He presses a simple kiss to her cheek and leans back. Britney lets out a breath she didn’t know she'd been holding, but JC's still looking at her, poised in an almost-question.

He leans forward again and kisses her softly, for real this time. Britney gasps, and JC takes it as an invitation and licks along her bottom lip, slips his tongue in tentatively. Something in Britney snaps, and she surges forward and presses him back against his seat, straddling his thighs. She bites at his lower lip and slides her tongue desperately against his. His fingers inch up under her tube top and splay across her ribs. She shivers.

The song changes.

Britney pulls back, panting softly. "Um," she says, tugging her top down. "Um."

JC laughs breathlessly. "Yeah. Um."

She retreats back to her seat and runs a nervous hand through her hair.

"I'm sorry, I shouldn't have done that. You were just being nice."

JC's eyebrows rise, "Uh? No, this is my fault. You're just feeling blue. I shouldn't have taken advantage." He cracks into a grin, "Think we can pretend this didn’t happen?"

Britney smiles. "Um yeah. I guess. It's not like we really like, like each other."

"That's right. I mean, no offense. You're really hot but—"

"No, I know. Been there. It never works out." She glances up at her house and opens the car door. "You promise me things won’t be weird now? Promise me you'll still talk to me?"

JC grasps her hand and kisses it. "I promise," he says. "I'm not Justin."

"Yeah," Britney says, softly, "I know."

JC smiles and pulls her to him in a tight hug, whispers into her hair, "You're amazing. You know that, right?"

She smiles against his neck, "Fuckin' A."

They break apart and Britney gets out of the car and waves JC off. She walks up the driveway feeling strangely lightheaded.

Her mom's made a Caesar salad and Britney eats in silence as her mom babbles on about redecorating or something; whatever her new pet project is. There's a new one practically every week, so Britney's stopped paying attention.

After lunch she runs up to her room and stuffs as many clothes and as much make-up as will fit into her duffle bag and catches a lift with her mom over to Christina's house.

Christina answers the door in a black sequined tube top and a pair of baby blue boyshorts.

"Cute!" Britney coos, and follows Christina up to her room. There's Backstreet Boys blaring through the house. No one but Britney is allowed to know that Christina owns Backstreet CDs. To everyone else, Christina is a hardcore hip-hop fan. Britney once discovered a Hanson poster at the back of her closet, but they don't speak about that.

Britney unloads her bag onto Christina's plush double bed and starts scrabbling through the clothes.

"I don't know what to wear!" she cries. "Like, I don't want to wear something too nice 'cause I just know some ass is gonna push me in the pool and it would get ruined…but I still want to look good."

Christina nods in agreement. "Dressing for pool parties is a bitch. Oh, and we're getting a ride with JC."

Britney stops rummaging and meets Christina's eyes in the mirror.

"Um," she says.

Christina lowers her mascara wand. "What?" she asks, suspiciously.

"I maybe…kinda…madeoutwithJCabitinthecartoday?"

Christina scowls, "What? In English, please."

"Um. I made out with JC in the car today. Just a bit," she adds.

Christina's eyebrow rises in a perfect arch. "Serious? Oh my god! Are you guys getting back together? What happened?"

"Well—"

"No, wait," Christina says, grabbing Britney's wrist. "This needs to be discussed over ice cream! Let's go to the kitchen." And she drags Britney downstairs and sits her at the breakfast bar on one of the stools.

"So, spill!" she decrees, the tub of Ben & Jerry's tucked against her hip. She walks over and lays it on the counter, hands Britney a spoon.

"Well, it's really not that exciting…" Britney says, muffled through a mouthful of Half Baked, and proceeds to describe the afternoon's events.

Christina nods once she's finished and lets her spoon dangle from her fingers thoughtfully. "Hmm," she says. "Interesting. So you really don't, like, like him again?"

Britney slips the spoon out of her mouth and shakes her head. "Mo," she says, mouth full of ice cream, "mot weely."

"Huh. That's a shame. There's not been any juicy gossip in a while. I'm slightly disappointed."

Britney rolls her eyes and swallows. "Such a gossipy little bitch."

"You know it," Christina says, and puts the ice cream back in the freezer.

"Well here's some gossip for you: I'm going to hook up with Orlando tonight. Seriously. I am so horny right now it scares me."

Christina groans. "God, don’t even talk to me about horny. I'm like, going fucking crazy! It's been over a month since I got any! You know," she checks around surreptitiously, "I even bought a vibrator!"

"Oh my god! You didn't!"

"I did!"

Britney laughs, "Damn, girl!" she pauses. "Well…what's it like?"

"It’s fucking awesome! Best sex I never had!" Christina announces, and they both shriek with laughter.

They head back up to Christina's room, and there's only an hour until JC arrives so they'll have to hurry. Christina brings up the bottle of schnapps.

They do the first shot immediately, and Britney feels the syrupy alcohol trickle down her throat with a mixture of excitement and anticipation. Tonight is going to be good; she's going to make sure of that.

Eventually Britney decides on her blue sequined bikini with the peacock pattern and a sparkly black strapless dress with flip-flops. Christina wears a blood red bikini with a teeny pair of denim hotpants and the nasty red halterneck. Always slightly conscious of her height, she wears red wedge flip-flops.

It being a pool party, they're kind of limited to only waterproof make-up. Britney puts on lashings of black mascara and smudges on some black eyeliner and some pearly lipgloss and that'll have to do.

When JC rings the doorbell, they're already halfway through the schnapps and collapse in giggles as they answer the door. JC takes one look at them and says, "Uh oh." And that's really funny, too.

Britney slaps at Christina's arm when she won't stop staring at JC's ass.

"God," she announces, slumped in the back seat, "you are fucking fine, Jayce!"

JC laughs. "Thanks Chrissy. That means a lot."

Christina breaks into a fit of giggles. Britney tries to shush her but just ends up laughing too.

"You know," Britney proclaims, "I am really, really drunk!"

JC glances in the mirror and rolls his eyes. "No shit, babe."

Britney can hear the music from Lance's house over a block away and she starts nodding her head in time with the beat. Christina joins in and Britney feels inspired to start beat boxing. She hears JC laugh.

JC parks on the lawn next to Justin's car. Britney stumbles out and heads over to the house. Once she gets inside firm hands grab her from behind.

"Hey!" she says indignantly, turning to face her attacker.

"Hey," JC says. "I want you and Chrissy to stay away from the pool, 'k?"

Britney rolls her eyes. "Fuck off. Why?"

"Because I don't want you to die," JC says dryly, and kisses her cheek. "Be good."

"Yeah!" Britney yells after him, "Right back at ya!" And she laughs to herself and follows the sound of music into the living room. She sees Lance hovering nervously by an expensive looking vase, directing vicious looks at anyone within a five-foot radius.

"Hey Lance," she says. "What are you guarding so neurotically? Other than your virginity."

Lance rolls his eyes, "Lovely to see you, too."

Britney grins and plants a sloppy kiss on his cheek. "You know I love you," she says. "And you know I only mock because I myself am so, like, relationship-challenged."

"You've been drinking, haven't you?" Lance asks suspiciously.

"Never!" Britney cries, and staggers backwards.

"Right," Lance says.

Britney rolls her eyes. "You're dull," she accuses, and heads out to the pool.

"Justin!" she yells, spotting him over at the far end of the pool deck.

She runs over to find Justin talking to some redheaded girl that Britney's never seen. She glares at her and the girl leaves, running a proprietary finger down the middle of his chest.

"Hey baby," Justin says, and looks her over. "You look stunning, as always."

"Oh shut up," Britney says.

"No, you do," Justin says, wrapping his arms around her waist.

"Hmm," she says, but she's smiling.

Justin grins and presses little kisses down her neck and over her collarbone. She giggles and swats him away.

"Tickles," she says, and kicks at his foot.

"You smell like toffee," Justin says, approving. "You've been drinking Chrissy's shit again."

"Yep," Britney says, and strokes a finger down his belly. He's wearing only his swimming trunks and he looks good. "You been working out again?"

Justin nods. Britney feels a hand on her shoulder and she looks round, annoyed. Justin looks up.

"Let's get you away from the pool, babe," JC says, hand insistent on Britney's arm.

"Hey C," Justin says, and untwines himself from Britney. "Gonna come for a swim?"

"Maybe later," JC says, and drags Britney inside.

"Hey!" Britney yells. "You ass! This is a free world! What about my rights!"

Once inside, JC leads her into the kitchen and pours her a glass of water.

"Here," he says.

Britney takes the glass. It's cool and damp in her hands, and the water trickles like ice down her throat.

JC watches her steadily, making sure she drinks the whole glass. He places it back on the counter and circles his arms around her waist.

"Hey," he says, "I think you should stay away from Justin for a little while. You know what always happens."

Britney scowls. "So? Maybe I want it to happen."

JC shakes his head, "Nuh-uh. You know it's never been about what you want. Please, just stay away. I don't want you to get hurt."

She sighs. "Ok, fine, but only 'cause it's you asking."

JC smiles and kisses her nose, "Be careful, baby."

She stands in the kitchen, watching as he goes back towards the party. She turns on the tap and splashes a little water on her neck. Chris comes in, carrying a bottle of rum.

"I come bearing gifts," he says, taking a long swig and offering the bottle to Britney.

"Rum's nasty," she sniffs, but drinks anyway.

"The drink of pirates!" Chris announces, "Avast ye!"

Britney giggles and swipes her mouth with the back of her hand. Her lips feel hot and tingly.

Chris takes the bottle and grabs her hand, drags her out into the sitting room to dance.

Britney grins and starts dancing with him, shimmying wildly. It's warm and bright and swirly in her world, and it's wonderful.

"I can feel the music!" she yells over the heavy bassline.

"Fucking lightweight!" Chris accuses.

"You know it!"

There's a solid presence behind her, and Britney turns round and sees Orlando.

"Orlando!" she squeals, dragging him into a hug. "Dance with me!"

Orlando smiles and wraps his arms awkwardly around her hips. The music clicks off. There's an outraged shout from the crowd. Orlando removes his hands from her waist and heads back out to the pool with a, "See ya later."

Britney watches him go, frowning slightly. She hears Christina's voice coming from the kitchen, and goes to find her, stumbles into a pot plant as she walks through the door.

"Hey," Christina says, rummaging through a cupboard. "I'm looking for alcohol. Wanna help?"

Britney nods emphatically, then stops. "Whoa. Dizzy."

Christina laughs. Then something behind Britney catches her eye and she turns away.

"Hey baby," Justin says, his words smudged against Britney's jaw. Britney grins and leans back against the sturdy support of his body.

"Hey yourself."

"I love the dress," he says, running a confident hand over her hip.

Britney sways and turns to face him. "Nuh-uh," she says, giggling. "We're not doing this again, mister."

Justin raises his eyebrows and his hand stills by her thigh. "Doing what, exactly?" he asks, and his eyes are dark.

"This!" Britney says, gesticulating desperately. "Your hand! You say you just want to be friends and then you start rubbing up on me whenever we're both drunk! I won't stand for it! Either you make an honest woman out of me or you…or you fuck off!"

There's a stunned silence. Britney glances around sheepishly. Some people clap. She grins. Justin removes his hand and presses a chaste kiss to her neck.

"I'm sorry babe," he says and disappears off into the crowd.

Britney stares after him blankly.

"Good for you," Christina says, coming to stand next to her. "You put your foot down. We all know he's just been fucking you around."

Britney turns to look at her, and she feels hollow and sick and her world is still swaying.

"Um," she mumbles. "Um." And bursts into tears.

Christina gathers her into a hug. "Oh, honey," she coos. "He doesn't deserve you."

And Britney can't even bring herself to fake a smile.

-------

Britney wakes up with a bottle digging into her cheek and the taste of toffee in her mouth. She groans and gets up with a lurch.

"Huh," she mutters, trying to work out where she is. She looks out of the window. It's dark. There's a mirror on the wall. Britney looks in it. "Huh," she says again, and peels the label off her cheek. She peers closer. "That waterproof stuff is good." She feels a little better.

It turns out that she's still in Lance's house, and the party's still going on. This is, at first, confusing. She must have fallen asleep at some point, but she really doesn't remember it. She definitely still feels a little drunk, but it's not too bad.

She stumbles slightly in the passageway but makes it to the bathroom without further problems. She locks the door and gazes sadly at her reflection.

"Britney," she says, "you're a mess."

Mirror Britney nods. She washes her mouth out with mouthwash and drinks a glass of water and feels almost fresh. She thinks back and remembers Justin. Her stomach lurches and she leans over the sink warily. It feels like it happened ages ago.

She walks downstairs cautiously. She wants to get out of there. The noise of happy, partying, drunken people sounds like it's echoing from a sort of bubble, one that she's not in. And she doesn't want to drink more because it'll just make this worse. And she doesn't want to run into anyone she knows feeling like this because she knows she'll just burst into tears again.

"Brit?" she flinches and turns around to see JC.

"Mph," she replies, non-committal.

"You okay?"

Britney nods, afraid that if she opens her mouth all that will come out will be a pitiful sob.

"Come here," JC says, and pulls her into a reluctant hug.

"Mph," she says sadly, muffled against his chest.

She feels JC laugh softly, and his fingers stroke through her hair.

"It'll be OK, Brit. It'll get better, I promise."

Britney suppresses a sob and coughs instead. The cough ends up getting stuck in her throat, and then she's choking, and that makes her hiccup too. Choking and sobbing and hiccupping at the same time and really she just feels wretched.

"Shit," she mutters, "this must be so unattractive."

JC laughs and kisses the top of her head. "Baby, you look gorgeous. Even choking, sobbing and hiccupping. Really, it's enviable."

"Whatever," she sniffs, but she feels maybe a little bit better.

"You did the right thing," JC says. "And I went and kicked Justin's ass 'cause he deserved it."

"Yeah? Did you tell him his goatee looks fucking stupid?"

JC laughs. "No, but I will. Oh, I will."

"Good. He needs to be told. Besides, it's all nasty and scratchy. God, he sucks."

"Amen."

JC's hand rubs soothing circles on her back, and Britney smiles into the crease in his shirt.

"You're so lovely, JC," she says, slightly muffled into his chest.

"Right back at ya."

They stay like that for a while, until Britney feels herself getting sleepy.

"Um," she says. "I'm wiped, Jayce. I think I'm gonna, like…"

"You want a ride home?"

Britney shakes her head. "No, I told mom I was staying over at Christina's."

"Are you?"

"No. We were both gonna stay here. I don't know, I just need to get out of here I think."

JC nods.

"Well," he says, after a moment's thought. "I could take you back to mine. My parents are away. Only thing is…I promised Justin he could stay too."

"Oh."

"I mean," JC adds, quickly, "I could take you back now if you like and then you'd probably be sound asleep by the time he got back, so you could probably avoid him completely?"

Britney considers this. "Yeah," she says. "Yeah. That would be great. Thanks, C."

"No problem," JC says, and leads her out to his car.

They drive back in silence. Britney stares out the window at block after block of black, shadowy houses.

JC helps her out of the car and towards his house. He unlocks the front door and flicks on the hallway light. Britney slouches back against the wall.

"Oh," JC says, "hey, let me." And he picks her up and carries her upstairs, lays her down on his bed.

"You have my bed; Justin's stuff's already in the spare room. I'll take the sofa."

Britney gazes up dreamily at JC and crawls under the duvet. "Make Timberfuck take the sofa," she says, smiling.

JC laughs. "Yeah, ok."

Britney props herself up against the headboard and tugs JC down next to her. She grasps his hand, "Thank you," she says. "I love you, babe."

JC smiles. "Love you too," and he kisses her temple and gets up.

"I'll lock the front door, OK? Sleep well, gorgeous."

Britney smiles and gives him a pinky wave as he walks out the door.

---------

When Britney wakes up there's sun streaming in through the window. Her mouth tastes sour and dry. Her flip-flops are still on.

She gets up and walks downstairs, steadying herself against the wall.

There are voices coming from the kitchen. Britney hovers by the doorway, just out of view, and peeks in.

JC is leaning against the fridge, holding a carton of juice.

Justin is leaning against the counter, opposite him.

JC sighs. "Look, you just need to sort this shit out. I know you're not a deliberate asshole, but maybe you just need to think about stuff a bit more. You're hurting people."

Justin crosses his arms defensively. "Yeah? Like who?"

"Like Britney."

Britney freezes.

"Britney? Why's she upset?" he sounds genuinely confused.

"That little speech she gave you? Did you not hear it?" JC says, exasperated, and takes a swig of juice.

"She was drunk, man."

"She meant what she said. Like I keep telling you, you've got to stop fucking her around. Either date the poor girl or stop getting her hopes up."

There's a pause. Justin lets out a long breath.

"Shit," he says. "I honestly thought she was cool with it."

JC shakes his head. "Well, you thought wrong. You need to talk to her."

Justin nods vigorously. He looks thoughtful, "God. I'm such an ass."

"Amen," JC mutters, and takes another gulp of juice.

"Hey, so you get any last night?" Justin says, obviously eager to change the subject.

"Nah."

"Not up to your standards, huh?"

JC laughs, "Right. You nail that redheaded chick?"

Justin shakes his head. "No. I was gonna, but then she fucking passed out." He laughs ruefully, "I mean damn! Have some manners, you know?"

JC laughs. "You're such an ass, man."

Justin looks at his feet. "Yeah, I know."

JC walks over and stands next to him, nudges him with his shoulder.

"Hey—look. You'll sort it all out. You always do. It'll be fine."

Justin looks at him and smiles, slings an arm around his shoulders.

"I hope so, C," and he takes the carton of juice and takes a long swig. Britney notices JC watching his throat.

Britney gives it a few moments and then walks in, rubbing at her eyes.

"Morning, sweetheart," JC says, ducking out of Justin's arm and drawing her into a loose squeeze.

"Morning, baby," she mumbles.

"Um," Justin coughs, and Britney looks up. "Um," he continues. "Look, Brit, about last night—" JC takes this as his cue to leave.

Justin steps closer to her. "I'm really sorry, baby. I didn't mean to give you the wrong impression. It won't happen again."

Britney scowls, but lets him link their hands together.

"You deserve better than me," he says, and nuzzles at her neck.

"Don’t I know it," she mutters.

"So we're cool then?" he asks, hopefully.

Britney sighs resignedly. "Yeah. Of course we are."

Justin smiles and kisses her cheek. "You'll find someone, B, mark my words."

"Oh go to hell," she replies, but she's smiling too.

JC comes back in and looks questioningly between the two.

"It's sorted," Justin says. "Right, babe?"

"Right."

JC grins at them both and comes over to wrap his arms around their waists.

"You guys," he says. "God, you'll be the death of me; all this drama and shit. I feel like Oprah."

"Look like her, too," Justin says, earning a kick to the shin from JC.

Britney leans her head onto JC's shoulder.

"Come on, Brit, I'll drive you home," he says.

He disentangles himself and clasps Britney's hand. "See ya later, J."

Britney waves at Justin, "Bye babe."

"See ya later gorgeous."

Once they're in the car, driving back to Britney's house, JC asks, "So, things are OK between you and J now? I hope you made him grovel."

Britney twiddles a strand of hair around her finger and sighs. "No. You know what he's like, with that stupid puppy-dog look. He was forgiven from the word go, and he knew it."

"Someone needs to kick that boy into line. He's far too cocky and charming for his own good."

"Tell it like it is," Britney says, and flips on the radio.

JC drives into Britney's driveway and stops. "So," he says, turning to look at her. "You free tonight? Wanna come over to mine and get stoned with me and Timberfuck? I'll let you put glitter on me."

Britney grins, "It's a done deal. I'll bring Clueless. We can watch it once he's gone to sleep. Just our little secret."

JC punches the air, "Yess! I love that film!"

Britney laughs. JC coughs. "This stays between us," he says, menacingly.

Britney mimes zipping up her lips. JC smiles and kisses her cheek, "I'll come pick you up at about six. See ya later, B."

Britney gets out of the car and waves back at him, "Later hotstuff."

--------------

JC rings the doorbell at a quarter past six, and Britney hurries down, wearing her skinny low-slung jeans and a little pink tee. She's curled her hair into long, loose waves.

"Your ride, Madame," JC says, taking her hand and bowing.

Britney giggles and lets him lead her to the car.

JC turns the radio on and they drive in silence. He opens Britney's door for her when he's pulled up to his house, and escorts her inside. Justin's already there.

"Hey," he says. "I like the hair."

"Thanks. I see you shaved that…thing off your chin. It looks good."

Justin runs his hand over his newly smooth jaw and grins. "Don't let it be said that I'm not man enough to take advice."

"It's a definite improvement isn’t it?" JC says to Britney, and winks.

They walk into JC's sitting room and Justin takes a sachet and some papers out of his schoolbag. He rolls a joint and sticks it between his lips. He fumbles around in the bag for some matches, and lights the spliff. He takes a deep, long puff.

"Mmm. This is good shit," he says, letting his eyes fall close as a stream of smoke falls from between his lips.

JC grasps Justin's hand and brings the joint to his mouth, takes a long drag. Justin passes it to Britney, and she inhales and holds the smoke in until her eyes water. She exhales with a splutter and the guys laugh.

"Inexperienced, much?" Justin asks.

"I prefer to devote my time to other areas of expertise," Britney says haughtily.

"And for that, we thank you," Justin says, grinning.

The joint gets passed around again, and again, until Justin takes one, long, last drag and declares it finished.

He grins at Britney and JC and slumps back against the chair.

"Mmm," he says, "I feel mmmellow."

JC giggles and strips off his jersey. Underneath, his t-shirt is crinkled and doesn't quite cover his belly. Britney smiles and sneaks her hand under her own tee to splay over her bellybutton, where she can fiddle with the sparkly dragonfly that's currently adorning it.

"That was strong stuff, J," JC says. "Damn."

Justin laughs and rolls another.

One hour and three joints later, they're all splayed out over JC's carpet.

"Hungry," Britney whines. "JC, I need food. Food good. Foog goof. Goog. Good," and she collapses into giggles.

JC gets up and disappears, only to return a few moments' later with a packet or Doritos and a pitcher of water.

"Oh you fucking God," Justin gasps, and grabs the pitcher. He tilts it back to drink, but it's too far and it spills all over his t-shirt. Justin just laughs and strips it off. Britney takes a moment to admire the view before delving into the Doritos.

Justin crawls over to the bag of chips, nestles close at JC's side.

"Hey," JC says, with a smile slow like syrup.

"Hey yourself," Justin replies and plunges his hand into the bag sitting between JC's knees.

"You have any more weed left?" Britney asks.

"Yeah," Justin says, "enough for one last joint."

JC slings his arm around Justin's shoulders. "Good man."

Justin smiles and dips his head, nuzzles JC's neck. Affectionate by nature, drugs of any kind seem to send him into contact overdrive. Britney thinks it's sweet, really. She puts the last chip in her mouth and sucks it 'til it's good and soggy.

Justin rolls the final joint and lights it. "Right," he says, "you gotta blow the smoke into each other's mouths." He takes a long drag and leans over to Britney, places his lips over hers and blows the smoke into her mouth in one thick, velvety puff. Britney breathes it in and licks her lips. Justin passes the joint to JC.

JC breathes in and also leans over to Britney. He slips her tongue as he blows the smoke into her mouth, and she splutters and lets it all out.

"Hey! Pervert!" she accuses, and glares at them both. "Now it's y'all's turn. I don't think I can smoke any more. I like, can't feel my toes."

JC laughs, "Right. First symptom of being stoned: numb toes."

Britney giggles. Justin shrugs and takes a drag, leans over to JC and places his lips over the other boy's. JC's eyes fall closed and he breathes in deeply. One of his hands comes to rest in the small of Justin's back. He freezes suddenly and coughs, lets his hand drop. Justin sits back on his haunches, grinning.

"You dirty bastard!" JC giggles. "That was below the belt, man. You're a freak. Stop trying to slip me tongue."

Justin blows him a kiss and sneaks an arm around his waist. "But you're just too purdy," he drawls.

JC rolls his eyes. "Shut up, straight boy."

Justin laughs. The spliff has burnt out. Britney turns on the TV, "I think we should watch a movie. What do you guys wanna see?"

"Die Hard!"

"Dude Where's My Car!"

"Little Women!"

Two pairs of eyes fix on Britney. "No," Justin says. "No. Not again. For the love of god, Brit."

Britney laughs and throws a pillow at him. "Shut up, it's a good film! It's, like, a classic!"

"Whatever. It's still fucking lame. We’re watching Dude Where’s My Car, discussion over."

JC nods and gets up to rummage through a large trunk by the sofa. He gets out a DVD and sticks it in the player, and drags Justin and Britney up onto the sofa where they sprawl in a cozy huddle with Britney in the middle.

"Jessica Alba's in this," JC says, and high-fives Justin.

"Fuckin' A. That girl is fine," Justin agrees.

Britney gazes, mesmerized, at JC's floral wallpaper. She's not really listening. "Ooh," she mumbles. "Pretty." JC and Justin share an amused look.

"There something you wanna tell us, babygirl?" Justin asks, poking her in the ribs.

"Huh?"

Justin laughs, "Nevermind. Go back to your little world."

JC whispers into her ear, "We're still watching Clueless later, right?"

Britney grins, "Huh? Oh, you bet. And I'll put some glitter on you. You'll be like my sparkly little elf."

JC chuckles and ruffles her hair affectionately, "Weirdo."

"Back atcha."

-------------------

Britney wakes up with a blanket draped over her. She's been moved the edge of the sofa. She shifts a little and peeks up.

JC and Justin are curled together, kissing sleepily.

"Hey," Britney says, poking JC. "Hey. Stop that."

JC breaks the kiss and they both turn to look at her. Justin's smiling lazily, but JC looks flushed and a little embarrassed.

"Morning sleepyhead," Justin says, stroking circles on JC's back.

"Not again," Britney says, rolling her eyes at them. "You guys are such freaks."

Justin laughs. "Jealous?"

"Don't flatter yourself, babe." She laughs ruefully, "God, the stories I could tell about you two and your strange definitions of "friendship". I know all your secrets!" she adds, in a spooky voice.

Justin looks alarmed. "You, um. You wouldn't, right? I mean, I'm straight. This is just, like, a me and C thing."

"Sheesh. Give me a break. I'm not a complete bitch."

JC grins and pulls her towards them. He licks her neck and she giggles and pushes him away. "This is so fucked up," she declares, smiling. "I mean, do you not think?"

"Mmm," JC says, humming against her jaw. "You got that glitter?"

"Yeah," she says, and extracts a little pot from her pocket. "I wanna make y'all sparkle."

JC grins. Justin looks at the pot of glitter suspiciously. Britney dips her finger in and drags a gold stripe across Justin's nose.

"Oh," Justin says, catching her wrist. "You are gonna pay for that." He grabs the pot and smudges a shimmering line down Britney's neck. She snatches it back off him.

"Don't waste it," she snaps, and proceeds to paint JC's eyelids golden. "So pretty!" she says, sitting back to admire her work.

Justin smiles at JC and kisses his neck. JC takes the glitter off Britney and dips the tips of his fingers in. "This is just begging to be done," he tells her with a wink, and drags his fingers down Justin's chest.

Justin yelps. JC grins at him, pushes him back against the side of the sofa and smudges the lines with the palms of his hands.

Justin laughs shakily when JC reaches his nipple, "Oh, hey, stop. I'm really freakily sensitive."

JC just grins and rubs the pad of his thumb slowly across the little nub. Justin bites back a moan.

"I'm serious," he says unsteadily, "Stop. No, really. This is, like, almost turning me on. I wasn't lying when I said I needed to get laid."

JC's gold-tipped fingers retreat, almost reluctantly. Justin takes a deep, steadying breath. He looks at Britney and his eyes are soft and liquid and dangerous.

"No," she says, firmly. "Don't even think about it."

Justin turns to look at JC.

"You make one lousy straight guy," JC says, rolling his eyes. "Look at you. The first sign of a drought and you're offering it up to anyone who'll take you."

"Oh fuck you," Justin snaps, defensively. "I'm not offering anything. And talking of droughts, how's your love life at the moment huh, C? Just 'cause some of us have gotten used to sex as more than just a solo experience."

"Go to hell, Justin," JC spits. "We're not all manwhores like you."

"For fuck's sake, guys," Britney groans. "Shut up the both of you. You're both horny idiots with too much testosterone. Get over it." She snatches her glitter back off JC. JC glares at Justin. Justin gets up and searches for his t-shirt. He pulls it on, scowling.

Britney rolls her eyes and goes to put on Little Women. There's a collective groan. Britney settles back into the sofa with a smirk.

"This," she says, "This is what you get for being argumentative dicks. Now you are going to sit here, with me, watch the movie and damn well enjoy it!"

Justin snorts. "Right. You know? I think I might not. I'm'a make a sandwich." And he walks out.

JC glowers at Britney. "No," he says. "No. I'm not watching this again. I'd rather talk to Timberfuck than watch this." He gets up and follows Justin out the door.

Britney watches him leave, frowning. She crosses her arms huffily and turns defiantly towards the TV.

----------------

On Monday Britney wears her blue faded jeans and a purple bedazzled tank top. JC drove his parents' car into a dumpster on Sunday so she has to catch a lift with her mom.

She runs into Christina by her locker.

"Hey Chris," she says, taking out her History textbook.

"Hey yourself," Christina says, twiddling the drawstring on her top around her finger. "You have a good weekend? I'm sorry Friday got so messed up. I tried to find you, you know, but JC said you'd gone."

Britney sighs and slams her locker door closed, "Yeah it was a bit of a weird night. God, JC's such a sweetheart though."

"He's a total darling," Christina agrees. "Things ok between you and J now?"

Britney nods. "Yeah. I don't think anything's really changed but you know. It's Justin; what can you do?"

Christina sighs. "That boy," she says. "Someone needs to smack some sense into him. Or better yet, neuter him."

"Amen to that."

"What's this? Talking about me, ladies?"

Britney rolls her eyes. Christina turns around to Justin. "We were saying," she says, matter-of-fact, "that you need to be neutered."

Justin laughs and circles his hands around her waist. "And I love you, too," he says, smiling into her neck.

She slaps him away. "I am immune to your charm, Timberlake," she declares.

Justin shrugs, "To each his own." And he walks over to Britney and kisses her cheek.

Later, in the canteen, Britney finds herself sitting next to Orlando.

"I didn’t see you much at the party," he says. "Did you have a good time?"

"Um, yeah. It was OK."

"I'm sorry about you and Justin," he says, and stops when Britney freezes. "Sorry, I just heard something. Um, I didn't mean to—"

"No, it's ok. We're good now."

Orlando sighs in relief. "I thought I'd really put my foot in it, there."

Britney smiles. "No worries."

"Um, so," he says tentatively, "are you two together?"

"No," she says, and flicks her hair. "Just friends."

Orlando nods. "Ok. Ok, cool."

Britney smiles encouragingly and takes a sip of her soda.

"I'm having some people over at my house this Friday," he says. "It would be cool if you came. And, um, tell Justin too."

She smiles. "That sounds great! Um, and yeah, I'll let him know."

Justin, as it turns out, is playing basketball in the gym. She watches him for a bit, leaning against the door, and then announces her presence.

"Nice shot."

He looks round. "Oh, hey B. Wanna play?"

"Honey," she says, "I'm wearing strappy shoes. What do you think?"

"Well, gee. Sorry I don’t know proper, like, shoe etiquette. Man, do I feel stupid."

"So uncultured," she says. "You talked to Orlando? He's having some people round on Friday."

"Oh yeah, I heard something about that. You gonna go?"

"Yep. You?"

"Yeah. It should be good. Orlando's a cool guy."

Britney smiles to herself.

-----------

The week drags on and on. By Wednesday, Britney's already had enough and just wants the weekend to hurry up. She goes round to Lance's house after school to do their math homework together and catch up on the latest gossip.

Britney's lying on Lance's bed, trying to do the trigonometry worksheet they got given and Lance is sitting cross-legged on the floor.

"Goddamit," Britney scowls, poking the end of her pencil against her chin. "This is hard."

Lance looks up. "Well, it is advanced math."

Britney rolls her eyes. "Shut up, Bass." She chews her pencil a little. "So, you got any good gossip?"

Lance sighs, "No. Not really. Christina won't give me the time of day. Chris won't shut up about his new girlfriend. Pretty boring, really."

"Aw," Britney says, leaning over and scrubbing a hand through Lance's hair, "I'm sorry about you and Chrissy. I think she's having too much fun being single at the moment."

"Yeah. Besides, she has nasty clothes."

Britney nods in agreement. "Oh I know. I mean she looks good in them but still. There's just no excuse for chaps, I'm telling you."

"You said it, sister."

"So, you know anything about Orlando? You know, the British guy?"

Lance frowns thoughtfully. "Not really," he admits. "He's been hanging around Justin a lot; I haven't really talked to him."

"He's pretty hot. I like him," Britney says, doodling a little heart in the margin of her work.

"Yeah? Good for you."

Britney laughs, "Patronizing ass."

"You know what I meant, bitch," Lance says, and throws a pillow at her.

--------------

Friday finally arrives and Britney squeals excitedly as she's getting dressed, because tonight it's going to happen. Tonight she's going to hook up with Orlando.

She wears a denim mini and a baby tee. She's going straight from school to Orlando's so she makes an extra special effort with her make-up and hair.

She has Biology with JC first lesson, and they're learning about meiosis and mitosis. Britney spends her time passing notes to JC about Dr Jenkins' dandruff problem.

She runs into Orlando and Justin in the hallway after class and they discuss who to send to buy alcohol. Britney flicks her hair and laughs and thinks; yeah, things are looking good.

They all meet outside school and walk to Orlando's house, which is only two blocks away.

Orlando has been nominated to go to the liquor store, and Britney takes the opportunity to snoop around his house, find out his taste in music, stuff like that.

JC comes up behind her as she's scanning his CD collection and wraps his arms around her waist.

"What are you doing?" he asks, amused.

"Research," she says. "Either help or leave me alone."

JC laughs. "Wow, you're…thorough."

She whacks his arm and continues the exploration.

It turns out that Britney's never heard of most of Orlando's music. It seems to be mainly indie and punk type stuff, which she's never really been into.

"Maybe it's a sign," JC says. "Maybe you're just not meant to be."

"Go to hell," Britney says. "I need a man, and I am going to get him."

"Good luck. Probably best, though, if you don't get caught going through his stuff," JC says, and drags her back downstairs.

Orlando comes back with two bottles of vodka and a keg of beer and Britney and JC help him set it out on the kitchen table.

Justin walks is and whoops, "Orlando, man, you're my new god!"

Orlando grins and pours them each a shot of vodka. Britney watches Orlando and licks her lips.

By the time it's dark Orlando's house is thrumming with people. Britney's drunk and frustrated. She's been following Orlando around all night, casually turning up in whatever room he's in, but nothing's really happened. She stumbles determinedly into the kitchen and corners him against the fridge.

"Hey," she slurs. "Great party."

Orlando smiles. "Thanks. I'm glad you're having a good time."

"Yeah," she says, and feels suddenly reckless, "Yeah, I am. But—do you know what would make it better?"

He laughs, "No, what?"

Britney steps closer and looks up at him through her long, heavily-mascara'd lashes.

"Oh," Orlando says. "Oh my god, I just remembered something I need to do." He side steps her and kisses her cheek before hurrying out of the kitchen. Britney growls in frustration. She never fails like this. It just, it doesn't happen.

She sees JC out of the corner of her eye. He looks at her sympathetically. "Still no luck?" he asks, draping an arm across her shoulders and pulling her into him.

"No," she mutters. "I don't get it, JC."

JC doesn’t say anything. She looks up at him, eyes narrowed. "What?" she asks, suspiciously. "What is it?"

JC looks down at her and that better not be pity in his eyes.

"What! Tell me!" she demands, stepping away from him and glaring.

"I think you might have to give up on this one," JC says, carefully. "Orlando's, well, I think he bats for the other team if you know what I mean."

Britney's eyebrows shoot up. "Are you kidding me? What the hell! Why didn't you tell me this before, asshole!" she cries, whacking JC hard on the arm.

"Hey," he says. "Hey, calm down. I only just found out myself. I'm really sorry, B."

"How," she says, spitting the words out. "How did you find out?"

"No, It's nothing like that!" JC says indignantly, "I'd never do that! Jesus, girl, give me some credit."

Britney sighs. "Yeah, I know," she says, dejectedly.

JC pulls her into a hug. "I'm sorry, sweetheart. I know you really liked him."

"Yeah," she says, defeated. "Goddamit, JC, where have all the straight guys gone?"

"Well, to be fair, Orlando is the only actual gay guy in our school."

"Oh shut up," she says, leaning her head on his chest.

JC holds her, stroking soothing circles on her back.

"I need the bathroom," she says.

JC lets his arms drop and kisses her hair, "See ya later, babe. It's upstairs, the third door on the right."

"Thanks," she says, and heads out of the kitchen into the shadowy stairway. There are photographs lining the wall, but it's too dark to see them.

She gets to the top of the stairs and squints down the hallway. She turns left and counts three doors down. There's a door half-open on the opposite side; yellow light is spilling out into the passage. Britney, always on the lookout for gossip, walks over and peeks in.

She slaps her hand across her mouth to stop herself from crying out.

That's Justin leaning against the wall with his pants around his ankles and Orlando's head between his thighs. That's Justin with his mouth open and gasping, his hands tangled in Orlando's hair.

Britney scoots away from the door, eyes wide, and rushes into the bathroom, slams the door behind her, locks it. She stares into the mirror. She feels numb. Her stomach lurches. She slams her fist against the wall and slumps to the floor with a despairing sob.

Her mascara stings her eyes as it runs in black streaks down her face. She takes one look in the mirror and starts laughing hysterically, or she might still be crying. She can't really tell. It's funny really, that the two guys she likes like, well, each other. Or, it would be funny. It would be funny if it weren't so utterly depressing.

There's a knock at the door. "Hello? Is there someone in there?"

Britney freezes. It's Justin's voice.

Fuck it, she thinks, and opens the door. "Hi," she says, cheerily.

Justin takes one look at her and says, concerned, "Are you alright?"

"Yeah, I'm fine. Absolutely fantastic," and she steps aside to let Justin in.

He watches her warily as he passes, and picks up a flannel. Britney stares at the flannel.

Justin catches her staring. "Uh, there was a spill," he says. Then, "Are you sure you're alright?"

Britney wants to scream. She says, instead, "Hormones. You know, girly stuff."

"Ah," Justin says, and pecks her on the cheek as he walks out. He smells of spunk. Britney thinks she might puke.

She walks downstairs, zombie-like, and out the front door. Her house is over fifteen blocks away, but it doesn't matter. She has to get out of there. She takes off her shoes. The ground is cold and gritty beneath her feet and the air is sharp. It feels almost cleansing.

After two blocks she's tired and cold and thinks that maybe this wasn't such a good idea. Her fight or flight instinct having worn off, all she feels is miserable and pathetic and completely exhausted. She sits on the curb and stares at the empty street.

A car pulls up next to her. She watches, with fascinated horror, as a man gets out and walks over to her.

"Brit?"

She blinks. "C?"

He comes to sit next to her. "What's up? Someone said they saw you leave."

She rests her head on his shoulder and stares at her feet, orange and glowing under the streetlights.

"You wanna talk to me about it?"

Britney shakes her head.

JC nods, "Ok. That's ok. You wanna come back to the party?"

"Nuh-uh."

JC nods again. He looks at her, smiling a little. "You were really planning on walking home?"

Britney nods.

He laughs. "Crazy woman. Come on, I'll drive you."

She lets JC pull her up and lead her into his car. They ride in silence. Britney watches the shadowy houses pass by and thinks: huh, déjà vu.

"I think I'm going to stop drinking," she says, once he's pulled up at her house.

"Yeah?"

"No," she says, thoughtfully. "Probably not."

JC laughs and gives her a tight hug. "Gimme a call tomorrow, ok?"

She smiles. "Yeah. Thanks, C."

"No problem, babe."

She waves him off and walks towards her house. She stands in the porch for a few seconds, feeling gooseflesh prickle over her skin. She breathes in and walks inside.

------------

JC comes over to her house the next day and they sit up in her room, talking. Britney carefully avoids any mention of Justin or Orlando. After relaying to her what happened after she left, which turned out to not be much, JC looks at her with his head cocked to one side.

"So what did happen last night?" he asks, softly. "Why'd you leave?"

"Um," she says. "Orlando. And stuff."

"Oh," he says, catching her hand in his. "You were really caught up about it, huh?"

Britney considers telling him why she really left, but she can't bring herself to form the words. "Yeah," she says, instead. "Yeah, I was."

JC kisses the inside of her wrist.

---------------

Britney wakes up on Monday with a sense of dread. She really, really doesn’t want to see either Orlando or Justin and, inevitably, she will.

She considers wearing the new tiny red skirt she bought, but somehow there doesn't seem to be a lot of point. She tugs on a pair of torn jeans and a lacy strappy top. She can't be bothered to wear her contact lenses, so she puts on her glasses.

Her mom comes over to her in the kitchen, frowning slightly. She slides the glasses off Britney's nose.

"Oh honey," she says, "you don't want to wear those to school. You look so much prettier without them. Go and put in your contacts."

Britney sighs and trudges back upstairs. She puts her lenses in clumsily, and her eyes water, smudging her eyeliner. She groans and doesn't bother to reapply.

Britney stares out of the car in silence as her mom drives her to school.

Luckily, she has her morning lessons with Chris and they muck around and Chris gets sent out. She laughs so much that she gets a cramp. They walk out into the cafeteria together after class. JC comes up behind Britney while she's in the queue.

"Hey," he says, into the back of her neck. "I have gossip."

"Oh?" she says, placing a bread roll on her tray.

"Something's up with Justin and Orlando. They're acting really weird. I think they might have had a fight."

Britney freezes. "Um, what?"

JC nudges her forward. "I don't know, man, it's really fucking bizarre. They're completely avoiding each other."

"Weird," she says blankly, as the lunch lady dumps a pile of something that might be meat onto her plate.

"Yeah."

They walk over to the table where Chris has just sat down. JC asks Chris if he knows anything about the Justin and Orlando mystery, and Chris makes some crack about a lovers' tiff that makes Britney choke and snort soda out of her nose.

"Um," she says. "Oops."

JC looks at her quizzically. "You know something?" he asks, eyes narrowed.

Britney laughs. "No! God, Chris is just too funny."

"Huh," JC says, skeptically.

Chris raises an eyebrow, "Are you mocking me? You'd better not be mocking me, Chasez."

Britney tunes them out and looks anxiously around the lunch hall. She sees Justin walk in alone. He spots her and comes over to their table.

"Hey baby," he says, and kisses Britney's hair. He sits down next to JC.

"What's up with you and flower boy?" Chris asks, straight to the point. "He's usually following you around like a lost puppy."

Justin glares at Chris. "It's none of your fucking business, Kirkpatrick."

"Whoa! Touchy."

Justin doesn't say anything else. The lunch hour passes in a slow, awkward silence. Britney's almost glad to get back to class.

----------------

Justin comes over to her house after school. Britney answers the door and just stares at him.

"Um," he says. "Brit? Can I come in?"

Britney shakes herself out of her daze, "Yeah, of course." She steps aside and Justin walks in.

They go up to her room and Justin sits on her bed and motions for her to join him. She hovers apprehensively by the door but goes over to sit opposite him.

"What's up, J?"

"I need to talk to you," he says, and his hands can't keep still.

Alarm bells sound in Britney's brain. "Ok," she says. "Shoot."

"Well…oh god," he runs a hand nervously through his hair. "You know how C is, you know, bi?"

Britney nods and braces herself.

"Well. How to say this…I think I am, too. No, wait, I know I am."

Britney blinks. "Yeah, I know," she says, before she can stop herself. She slaps a hand over her mouth in horror.

Justin gapes at her. "What? How?"

Britney cringes. She looks down at her crossed legs. "Ok, so. Um, I might possibly have seen you on Friday night. With Orlando."

There's silence. Britney peeks up at Justin's face. She can practically hear the cogs turning in his mind.

"So," he says slowly, "was that why you…?"

She pauses, "…no."

He raises an eyebrow.

"Maybe," she admits. "It just…it was kind of a shock."

"Oh," he says, and takes hold of her hands. "Sorry you saw, um, that."

"Yeah," she says. "I can't believe you did that. You knew I liked him, J," and she's more resigned than annoyed.

Justin doesn't say anything for a while. He strokes his thumbs over the palms of her hands.

"I was drunk. I'm an ass. I'm sorry, B."

Britney nods. "What does this mean? You gonna start dating guys now?"

Justin laughs. "Maybe. I don't know. Probably not. I still like girls you know. A lot." He pauses, "Oh, and that's the other thing. Um, please don't tell anyone. I don't want to have to leave the team, you know, like C did."

She nods. "Talking of C, have you told him?"

Justin shakes his head. "No, not yet. I'm kinda avoiding it. I don’t know how he's going to take it."

"Well, I mean, if anyone's going to understand it's gonna be C. You should talk to him."

"Maybe. I gotta go round his later, anyway. Maybe if it come up it conversation or something." He looks at his watch, "Oh, hey. I gotta go."

Britney walks downstairs with him, and lets him pull her into a tight hug. "Thanks, babe," he says. "I'm sorry I'm such an ass."

"Well," she says contemplatively, "you're not all the time."

He kisses her cheek.

"Tell JC!" she yells after him.

----------------

The next morning, as she's heading off to school, her mom stops her and says; "Oh, honey, your father and I are going away for a few nights the day after tomorrow. Maybe you'd like to have one of your friends sleep over?"

Britney glares at her mom and walks out of the door. JC is waiting in her driveway in his parents' car.

"Good morning," she says, sliding into the passenger seat.

"Hey gorgeous," he says and pulls out of the drive.

"So," she says. "Did, um, did you see Justin last night?"

JC looks over at her. "Yeah," he says, slowly. "You know, too, right? He said he talked to you."

Britney nods.

JC turns his eyes back to the road. "It's so fucked up," he says. "Like, why? Why now? I don't get it. And, I mean, Orlando? What's that about? He looks about ten years old!"

Britney looks at him curiously. "Why does it matter? I mean, it's not a total surprise. Look at how he is around you. All the random kissing when you're both high. You can't say you never considered that he might like guys."

"Of course I considered it," JC snaps. "He's not actually bi, though, he can't be. He's just an overly horny, drunken idiot. I mean if he were bisexual, he'd have figured it out by now. You don't just randomly wake up one morning and start liking men."

Britney shrugs. "I don't know. Maybe he's only just realized it now. Or admitted it. I think you're overreacting a little, here."

"I just don't get it," JC says, exasperated. "Why now? Why him?"

Britney blinks. Something clicks in her mind. "Why not you, you mean," she says softly.

JC keeps his eyes fixed determinedly on the road and doesn't say anything.

"That's what this is really about, isn't it? You're jealous."

JC parks in the Wal*Mart car park and looks over at Britney.

"I just…I always thought that if he ever started liking guys, I'd be the first one he'd come to, you know?" He laughs ruefully, "I so had first dibs."

Britney sighs, "Unrequited love sucks, don't it?"

JC smiles sadly. "You know what? We should make a club. "Bitter Justinphiles.""

Britney raises an eyebrow. "BJs?" she asks and bursts out laughing.

JC grins, "Shit, yeah. I didn't realize. Heh."

"Kinda appropriate," she says and bites her lip.

"Isn't it just."

"Well my parents are going away tomorrow night. You should come round. We could have our first club meeting," she suggests. "Whadda ya say?"

"Yeah," JC says. "Yeah. Sounds good. We can watch Clueless and you know, actually watch it. Not have to hide."

Britney grins. "Yay! Plan!"

They get out of the car and walk to school, arms linked.

-------------

JC goes home with Britney after school on Wednesday.

"You know?" she says, whilst they're curled up together on the sofa halfway through watching Clueless, "it's not normal, is it? I mean, me and my ex brooding over the same guy."

JC looks at her and bursts out laughing. "God, understatement of the fucking year, Brit."

Britney jabs him in the stomach with her elbow. "Shut up."

The movie ends and Britney goes up to her bedroom to fetch the bottle of vanilla schnapps she's been hoarding. She goes back into the sitting room and hands JC a shot glass.

"Here," she says, and pours him a shot. "To drown our sorrows."

She pours herself a shot, too and they down them together.

"Ugh," JC says. "Nasty."

"Mmm," Britney agrees, and her throat is burning.

"I still remember why I'm depressed," JC says. "I think I need another."

Three shots later, and Britney starts to feel warm.

"You know," she says thoughtfully, "maybe we should just cut our losses and date each other again."

"Yeah?" he asks.

She shrugs. "It would make sense."

JC considers this. He looks at her questioningly. Britney meets his gaze steadily. He leans closer and halts, his lips just millimeters away from hers. "Are you sure about this?" he asks, his breath sweet and hot, one hand fiddling with the hem of her t-shirt.

"Yes," she whispers, and closes the gap.

She needs this; she needs him. She licks her tongue into his mouth and lets him press her down into the sofa, one cool hand slipping up under her shirt. She gasps and lets her eyes drift closed.

The front door slams.

They both jump. Britney tugs at her top and tries to steady her breathing.

"What the fuck?" she whispers, terrified. JC grasps her hand and walks cautiously towards the hallway.

"Hello? Brit?" Justin's voice.

Britney can't contain the groan. "Oh for fuck's sake," she mutters. "Why does he have to ruin everything? He's like a curse."

"Shh!" JC hisses.

Justin appears in the doorjamb, frowning. "Deaf, much?"

"We were busy," Britney snaps. "You should try knocking."

"I did." He looks between them. A light dawns, "Ohhh. I see. "Busy". Whoa, sorry."

JC lets Britney's hand drop. "Why are you here, Justin?"

Justin sits down on the sofa. "I had a fight with my mom."

"Oh my god! About…about the bi thing? Oh god, I'm so sorry!" JC rushes to sit by Justin's side.

Justin laughs. "No, man. Nothing like that. She found out I stole a fifty from her wallet."

JC hits Justin hard on the arm. "You ass! Christ. No wonder you had a fight."

Britney puts her hands on her hips. "So, what? You want to stay here?"

Justin smiles sheepishly. "Uh, yeah. If that's alright."

"Justin," she says evenly. "I'm going to close my eyes and count to ten. When I open them, I want you to be gone."

Justin gets up and circles his hands around her waist. He leans in and nuzzles her neck. "Please?" he whispers, "Pleeease? You can ignore me completely. I'll just go into the kitchen and…stare at things. It'll be fun. You won't even know I'm here."

Britney gives a resigned sigh. "Fine. Stay. Ughhh."

He kisses her cheek. "Love you."

"Whatever," she says, and goes to fetch another shot glass.

"We should play a game," Justin suggests. "A drinking game."

"Like what?"

"I never?"

JC snorts, "Bit of a foreign concept to you though, isn’t it J."

"Fine. We'll all just sit here glaring at each other."

Britney groans and takes a long swig from the bottle. JC takes it off her and takes a large gulp. Justin does the same.

"Look," Justin says, staring at his hands. "I'll just go. I don't want to ruin your week, too."

He gets up to go but Britney stops him.

"Don't be such a drama queen," she says. "Stay. I guess you've been having kind of a tough week. What with…you know."

"Thanks. It's not been the best."

He sits next to JC on the sofa, and snuggles into him automatically. JC sighs dramatically and wraps an arm around his shoulders. Britney comes to sit next to JC and clasps his hand.

"What, um. What happened with Orlando, exactly?" she asks tentatively. "Why have you been avoiding each other?"

Justin looks across at her. "You really want to know?"

"Hit me."

"It's pretty stupid, really. He wanted, like, a relationship and I…didn’t." He shudders, "It was fucking awkward."

"A possible new recruit for our club," JC whispers to Britney.

Justin looks at them both. "I love you guys," he says earnestly. "You've been so cool about this." He glances at JC, "Well, mostly. My brain's all a bit scrambled at the moment. Thanks for not freaking. And…sorry I ruined your little romantic evening."

Britney looks across to JC. "Probably for the best," she says and JC nods.

"Yeah?" Justin asks, surprised.

"Yeah."

Britney turns on the TV and curls into JC.

------------

Britney wakes up alone on her sofa. It's still dark. She rubs her eyes blearily. Her tongue is stuck to the roof of her mouth. "Unnghh," she mutters, pushing herself up. A blanket's been laid over her. Britney smiles.

She walks out of the sitting room and into the passageway. She's about to just walk straight into the kitchen when a snippet of hushed conversation catches her attention.

"—still weird." JC's voice.

"Why? Why's it so weird? Don't tell me you're still freaking out over this."

"Why is it weird? Because my best friend, who I've know since playschool, got sucked off by a guy! I thought you were straight!"

Britney edges closer, enthralled. She can just see JC and Justin through a crack in the door. Justin is leaning against the counter, arms crossed defensively across his chest. JC is glaring at him from the opposite counter.

Justin groans. "Jesus, I knew I shouldn't have told you. What the hell difference does it make, anyway? I didn't freak when you came out as bi."

JC looks incredulous. "What difference does it make? Only all the difference in the world!"

"The fuck?"

JC opens his mouth and closes it again. He sighs. "Oh I don't know. I'm just…kinda surprised, is all."

"Right. Surprised. Still."

JC scowls. "Look, no. It doesn't make any difference. I'm just tired and shit." He walks over to Justin and braces his arms against the counter on either side of Justin's hips. "Sorry," he says, and lets his head drop onto Justin's chest.

"You're such a fucking weirdo," Justin says affectionately, and hooks his thumb into the waistband of JC's jeans. "I thought you’d understand…you of all people."

JC nods, and his voice is muffled into Justin's chest, "I do. I just need to adjust a bit. Or something." He raises his head. "So was Orlando any good?"

Justin laughs, "Why? You interested? Yeah, he's good. Damn good. I mean, I haven't got a lot to go on in the way of guys but."

"Right. Yeah, maybe. He's pretty cute."

Justin nods and kisses JC's cheek. "You're pretty cute yourself."

JC leans back a bit and looks at Justin. "Yeah?" he says.

Justin grins slow and feral. "Yeah," he says, after a pause, and slides his thigh between JC's.

Britney feels her stomach lurch.

"Um?" JC says.

Justin trails a hand up JC's spine and curls it around the back of his neck. JC shivers. Justin draws JC closer to him and nudges at JC's mouth with his own.

"No," JC says breathlessly. "We can't Justin. Britney still likes you. We're in her fucking kitchen."

Justin's hands trail down JC's back, and creep up underneath his shirt. He leans his forehead against JC's.

"Yeah," he says. "I know. But god, C, I've wanted you for so long."

"Um?" JC coughs, "What?"

"Mmm," Justin breathes, brushing his lips across JC's jaw. "Fucking ages. Since I gave you that hickey last summer and you freaked and ran off. I thought I'd totally given myself away. I thought you hated me. All those times we made out when we were both high. I mean, did you not wonder?" he whispers, and drags his teeth down JC's throat.

"Oh god, Justin," JC moans. "Why are you only telling me this now? The only reason I freaked was because I thought you were kidding and I was," he laughs breathlessly, "hell, I was totally turned on."

"Yeah? You turned on now?"

"Fuck yes," JC gasps, and places one of Justin's hands between his thighs.

Britney gapes in horror. She's seen enough; she walks back to the sitting room with giddy steps and droops down into the sofa.

She's used to Justin and JC maybe necking a little when stoned, but this is different. This isn't, like, boys messing around, or just being really overly affectionate. This is…this is. Fuck, this is serious.

Britney shivers and curls up in the blanket. The room is dark and silent. She hears a low moan drifting in from the kitchen, and nestles into the blanket, feeling neglected and miserable. God, this was not how she imagined tonight to be.

There are footsteps coming along the passage. She pretends to be asleep. The sofa dips as someone comes to sit next to her, and a hand strokes through her hair.

She hears Justin's voice, from a distance. "C?"

"Yeah?" comes the reply from next to her.

"Come on, C, don’t do this. Brit'll be cool about it."

"Shh!" JC whispers. "Not now!"

"I'm not just fucking you around, Jayce. Jesus."

"Shh!" JC hisses. "Look, we'll talk about this later."

"Fine," comes the irritable reply. "Whatever."

Britney hears footsteps, and the creak of someone going upstairs. JC sighs. She gives it a few minutes and pretends to wake up. She yawns and rubs at her eyes.

"Hey," JC says softly, smiling. "Sleep well?"

"Mmm," Britney mumbles. "Did I miss the end of that weird film?"

JC laughs. "Completely. You didn't even make it to the first ad break."

"Meh. Seen it anyway," she says, sitting up. JC drapes an arm around her and pulls her to his side. She rests her head on his shoulder. She imagines she can smell Justin on his skin.

"Brit," he whispers into her neck, "you know if you hooked up with Justin I'd be cool about it, right?"

She narrows her eyes. "Where is this going?" she asks, although really, she already knows.

"Well, theoretically speaking…if Justin and I happened to, you know, how upset would you be? Scale of one to ten."

"Nine," Britney says spitefully. "Maybe ten."

"Oh," JC says. He sounds defeated. He sounds like me, Britney thinks.

"No, ok. Maybe five. Four."

"Yeah?"

No. "Yeah. I mean, I love you both, C. If it'd make you both happy."

JC smiles against her jaw. "I love you so much," he says. "Don't you ever forget that."

Britney smiles and snuggles down into the sofa. She pretends to fall asleep. JC stays a while, just stroking her hair. Then he gets up, untangling himself carefully, and pulls the blanket over her.

She hears his footsteps on the stairs.

She curls into the blanket and keeps her eyes scrunched closed. She feels numb. Hollow. She imagines watching this from a distance; how funny it would be. The guy she had a crush on hooks up with the guy she's liked for ever and turns him bi so he hooks up with her ex-boyfriend who she still loves and who's liked him for years, too! And to top it off? They're hooking up in her own house! It's like something out of The Bold and the Beautiful, except no one is secretly related.

It would be funny, Britney thinks, if it weren't the single most depressing thing in her life, ever. It would be funny if it didn’t make her want to scream. It would be funny if these weren't tears streaming down her cheeks.

But they are.

And it really, really isn't funny.

----------

Home

Feedback